I know you're super busy and stuff with the twins, but there's something we need to talk about. I really need to get it off my chest, and hello, I may only be 3 but my feelings matter too.
It's just that it REALLY bothers me how you introduced me to all those people at my preschool Open House as Pierce. SO EMBARASSING. Please Mom, please just STOP DOING THAT. It was the first time meeting my new friends and teachers, and I really needed to make an impression. How can I do that when you won't use my real name?
This is why I had to spend the entire time trying to do damage control, instead of getting to play with toys. I had to try to run ahead of you to introduce myself first. I think I covered most of the room with my proper introductions: "Hi! I'm Diego! That's spelled D-I-E-G-O" But then you'd come along and try to undo things and bring up that P name again. I AM NOT PIERCE. Don't you get it?
Does anyone out there know at what age I can legally change my name? Because the P name is like...so ridiculous.
And another thing. From now on please don't use that P kid's pictures on the blog. I have taken the time to provide you with the image I'd like you to use from here on out. It captures my good side:
Your First Born,